I ran a nice 16+ miles tonight in the rain. I had hoped I might catch a break from the down pour, but nothing doing. I thought the run would be rough too, seeing as how I went out and had 2 glasses of malbec wine and 2 more beers when I came home last night. (side note: I am not a bum, but I don't really go out anymore, unless you count me leaving the house for work or to go running).
I've come to terms with my performance at Akron and I'm moving on. No I take that back, I am using that race as motivation to train smarter and harder (and not run like that again). I am egocentric. I have always appreciated each and every opportunity to share a running (or triathlon or basketball) experience with whomever it is, but I am a competitive junkie at heart. When I am the slowest person or the least talented person, of course I am going to kill myself to be the best. The clock and the scoreboard don't reflect my effort, they just show how close or how far I am from the better opponent. It's like Iceman says in "Top
Gun" -- "No points for second place boys."
I am my own worst critic. I have been characterized as overly analytical more times than I can count. However, I am a realist and while I will never be Kara Goucher, I still have more milestones and PRs to attain. I just gotta "watch the hardeck" and maybe, just maybe I'll be able to "buzz the tower" soon.
2 comments:
Your drive is awesome! It's good to be a go-getter and want to improve yourself. I love that about you!!! But, I've been reading a lot of new-agey mental training books and they all say being hard on yourself and a "win or nothing" attitude are counter-productive to performing your best. I know you have TONS o' free time, but if you get a chance one of these days pick up a book by sports psychologist Jerry Lynch (I like Running Within , but The Total Runner or his Tao inspired books are good too. I struggle with being too hard on myself too, as you well know. It's helped me a lot to back off a bit. If nothing else I enjoy all aspects of training and racing a heck of a lot more! Anyway, just wanted to share.
PS I bet E-speed is rolling her eyes because she is sick of me talking about that darn book (Running Within)! Ha! But I can't recommend it enough!
You? Bum? Never! It's a sign of the times. People just aren't going out as much. I went to a concert this past weekend and saw large sections of the stand blocked off because they didn't sell out. If I didn't totally LOVE the artist, I'd have been home too.
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